Fan Of Corporate Comedies Gifts

"This position has become very important to the company."

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

Boss to worker taking out wallet: 'It's only fair, Pete. Last year, we shared profits!'

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

Office pics on dinner table.

"To address this mistake we must be professional and use root-cause analysis. I'll start by saying it's not my fault...."

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

Please bring me a few sharpened pencils and some lucrative business.

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

'I'm surprised you like being your own boss. I am your boss and I hate it.'

"He'll do anything to say in power."

"Gentleman I believe I've found a revolutionary new way for us to more productively waste our lives."

"I'm so efficient I can screw up two assignments in the time it takes most people to screw up just one."

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

'I don't want your input until you produce some output.'

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

Thesaurus Company

"Not bad, considering no one knows exactly what we produce or sell here."

'Make them a four billion dollar takeover offer, but don't cause a fuss.'

The role of administration.