Fan Of Corporate Comedies Pillows

"Let the minutes show that Mr. Nordquist zapped Mr. Limpet with a Taser."

'The 'insourcing' will go ahead and some jobs will be off to Leeds or Manchester, but I think I'll be safe...'

"This position has become very important to the company."

'And remember to emphasize we're giving them the opportunity to find a better job.'

'OK, team, let's review: when the arrow goes down, it means...?

Businessman on stilts: 'I had to step over a lot of people to get where I am today.'

"He's not really much of a leader...he just has a lot of followers."

'The good news is we're projecting a profit. The bad news is none of us will be alive then.'

'Well the good news is that we've landed some huge contracts in China!'

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

"Would you say that the sales projections in your 3 year plan are realistic?"

'Office' block tightening it's belt

"Your mother called to remind you to diversify."

Boss to worker taking out wallet: 'It's only fair, Pete. Last year, we shared profits!'

"Who gave you permission to ask for a raise?"

'Can he call you back? He's taking time to stop and smell the profits.'

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

'How would you feel about working in a small pond?'

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'The boss said I never made any profits and I never found customers worth mentioning and that's why he promoted me to the company's chief bad example!'

Office pics on dinner table.

"To address this mistake we must be professional and use root-cause analysis. I'll start by saying it's not my fault...."

Please bring me a few sharpened pencils and some lucrative business.

'Excellent!...We've been looking to hire someone who can think outside the box.'

'I'm surprised you like being your own boss. I am your boss and I hate it.'

'What's wrong? Think the walls have ears?'

"Yes, we do accept resumes online, but there's more to it than giving me your computer with your resume on it."

"He'll do anything to say in power."

"I'm so efficient I can screw up two assignments in the time it takes most people to screw up just one."

'I don't want your input until you produce some output.'

"Gentleman I believe I've found a revolutionary new way for us to more productively waste our lives."

Dogs reviewing organizational chart - 'Hunter can eat Spanky or Fido, Spanky can eat Spot or Duke,....' and so on.

"Not bad, considering no one knows exactly what we produce or sell here."

Thesaurus Company

The role of administration.