Family Milestone Gifts

Jewish Hall of Nachas

Snowman family with snow mother cleaning up mess left behind.

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

"Sign my yearbook?"

"He doesn't really talk yet, but he does some sound bites."

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

"You're 5 years old now, Timmy. It's about time you retain an attorney."

Toy Shops and Educated Children

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

One!

His first conspiracy theory...'Is it a coincidence the first time I walk, they start locking all the cupboards? I think not!'

Mother's Love

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

'Son, the world is ripe for the taking ... you better stay home with me.'

"No, four glasses of water was enough. . . now I have to go to the bathroom!"

Ogden Nash: 'Middle age is when you've met so many people, that every new person reminds you of someone else.'

"Wait! I don't want to be disease resistant!"

Vampire baby in 'Grav-co' stroller.

"Car accident? No, I volunteered to hold the rope for the pinata at my son's birthday party!"

'How can I get my baby to sleep?'

First Steps

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

Parent Involvement Tip #1

"It makes you look old."

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

Sparkler

"No, I don't believe youth is wasted on the young. I believe money is."

A very fine vintage

"Technology is for babies!"

Eagle parenting.

'I'm being punished. Nothing even remotely electronic for two weeks.'

'Who said you could come out of your room?'

"Yes, I'm sure some child in Brussels won't starve if you eat his sprouts."

'Oh Darling, I'm so proud! I wish I could give you a big hug!'