Family Milestone Enthusiast Gifts

'She passed potty training!'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

Pearly King and Queen

'You never met my father? Never mind, I'm turning into him!'

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

One!

'Son, someday this will all be yours. Or Wal-Mart's. Whoever pays Daddy the most.'

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

First Steps

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

A very fine vintage

'She said her first words today.'

Eagle parenting.

"Son, one day all this will belong to your tax office, your economy-hating environmental wackos and your corrupt political clowns."

Jewish Hall of Nachas

"Our little girl has blossomed into quite the little complainer."

Medical school graduation gowns.

"I'm too old for baby limas."

"As long as we're renewing our vows anyway, I've come up with a few new ones."

"Worthy of an Oscar don't you think?"

"Jack, I'm looking through these old love letters, faded flowers and other sentimental objects meant to inspire tender memories… junk?"

'My grandson has been walking from an early age. . . Oh yes, in fact, by the time he was two he'd been walking three years.'

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

'Look, he's taking his first steps.'

'Her first telekinesis!'

"And we're just so proud you're walking to school alone. Aren't we, Harold?"

'Look daddy,look! I'm exactly 3 feet tall!' (a child foot getting measured for height).

'You told me you'd spend your whole life trying to make me happy.' 'I didn't expect to live this long.'

'Dude, don't do it. Somewhere down the road it will lead to chores.'

'She's just done her first tweet.'

"It wasn't until after fifty years of marriage that Mike finally learned the importance of putting the seat down." "Happy anniversary. Now flush."

"Thirty years together and now you tell me you're Canadian?"

'Look Mummy: I've pu on my shell all by myself...'

Circus baby

Baby Holding a Condom.