Family Milestone Enthusiast T-Shirts

'She passed potty training!'

'Oh Darling, you must be so proud: Your first wart!'

'You never met my father? Never mind, I'm turning into him!'

Pearly King and Queen

John W. Law., John W. Law Jr., Robert Law, Janet Law, Attorneys at Law

'Son, someday this will all be yours. Or Wal-Mart's. Whoever pays Daddy the most.'

"Your mother and I want to make your 21st birthday a moving experience. We'll help you pack."

First Steps

A very fine vintage

"Charles, look! He’s sending his first text!"

'She said her first words today.'

Eagle parenting.

"Our little girl has blossomed into quite the little complainer."

"Son, one day all this will belong to your tax office, your economy-hating environmental wackos and your corrupt political clowns."

Jewish Hall of Nachas

"As long as we're renewing our vows anyway, I've come up with a few new ones."

"Jack, I'm looking through these old love letters, faded flowers and other sentimental objects meant to inspire tender memories… junk?"

"I'm too old for baby limas."

'My grandson has been walking from an early age. . . Oh yes, in fact, by the time he was two he'd been walking three years.'

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

'Her first telekinesis!'

"And we're just so proud you're walking to school alone. Aren't we, Harold?"

'Look, he's taking his first steps.'

'Look daddy,look! I'm exactly 3 feet tall!' (a child foot getting measured for height).

'You told me you'd spend your whole life trying to make me happy.' 'I didn't expect to live this long.'

'Dude, don't do it. Somewhere down the road it will lead to chores.'

'Look Mummy: I've pu on my shell all by myself...'

"It wasn't until after fifty years of marriage that Mike finally learned the importance of putting the seat down." "Happy anniversary. Now flush."

"Thirty years together and now you tell me you're Canadian?"

Baby Holding a Condom.

Circus baby

'Your father just needs the will to live-tell him you're ready to take over the family business.'