Family Member Who Loves Cats Gifts

"I have a large kitty. He's gentle, just don't make any sudden moves."

"Have I got a cat for you!"

"Maureen Alsop is leaving her magnolia, and her delphinium and her cats with us this weekend."

Cats on Board.

"The painting and pillows were his idea. The scratches were mine."

I'm beginning to regret buying that Roomba.

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

Cat puts off paying gas bill, to sleep longer...

"Do you remember ordering 1,345 cans of tuna?"

'My owner is feeding me way too much organic food.'

'@#$=%!} paparazzi!'

"Cat-astrophic Trifecta" "I pooped in Mona's Jimmy Choo handbag." "I knocked over grampa's ashes." "I buried a Barbie in the litter box."

"Satisfaction, stat!"

Snooze buttons for cat owners

Cat plays an arcade game that involves shooting at gun into a mouse hole.

"It's okay. I love hopping in bags!"

"Is listening to her talk about her feelings worth a tiny can of tuna?"

"How do I get down?"

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

'We don't do tricks.. because then they'll begin to expect it.'

'Now, all I need is a bird.'

Why cat yoga classes don't work

Evolution of the Cat.

'Now I really am sick.'

Zen Kitten

How cats see their home

'Who are you and what do you want?'

"He's very finicky."

"The meaning of life is cats."

"My cat just gave me the greatest password! She walked across my keyboard."

"It just comes naturally. I have good people skills."