Family Drama King Pillows

'You're so illogical. I can never win an argument with you.'

"Davina McCall: Life at the Extreme takes a celebrity to the most extreme places on Earth!"

"I'm voting for Stephen because I cannot stand Katie's mother, she is so catty! Anyway-- how're your parents doing with the divorce?"

"Have you read any of Shakespeare's plays?"

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Wedding Day Itinerary.

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

Junior barrister prompting a deaf and testy chief

"My wife thought the phrase 'stick it to the man' meant everyone, hence we're divorced. My new girlfriend and I met at a party. She's krazy, man. We bonded right away and now she's pregnant. It's a squeeze top. My brother's in rehab for sniffing. He never could get his nose out of my business."

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"I hate you! You don't understand me and you don't understand my software!"

"I take it you got the lead in the school play."

'Don't bother Daddy -- He fell in the moat again.'

The Unhappy King

'Hey, buddy, do you mind lending me a hand? I appear to be stuck in this thing.'

Waving from Behind the Curtain

'Not gruel, stupid! -- I said find the GRAIL!'

'Good news from the field, sire! Attila did not like the referee's call, so he's folding up his tents, taking his ball and going home!'

"Dad, why do they tell actors to "break a leg?""

"The artist-in-residence is struggling a bit, but other than that we're fine."

The Royal Wii

'Make him laugh, make him cry.'

The Birth of a Lawsuit

'I'm a star!'

'Tommy's book reports are like no other.'

'I cut myself slashing the budget!'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

Next, I recall looking down at myself and thinking, God, what a drama queen.

'You might want to try another photographer, Sire. This one tends to cut the heads off.'

(Mother Goose: playboy's Mirthful Master of the Macabre serves Up Some Strange Twists On a Clutch of Children's Classics.) "Is this supposed to be somebody's idea of a joke?"

'You can scratch your back when the war is over!'

'Between you and me Wizard, is it true that you intellectuals have pointed heads?'