Family Comic Relief Pillows

"Why, it's the bottle mother gave you for X-mas!"

"Don't mess with the electronic windows."

You Are Here

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

Though Mr. Frackman had yet to say a word, Bill sensed he was about to receive a particularly lousy performance review.

"Touché"

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

'Tommy is in the other room playing with the triangle we bought him in Bermuda.'

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

When Holy Cows Are Sent Out To 'Pastor'.

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

Dog Birthdays

'That never gets old.'

Tourist in the desert

'You've come a long way with your anger this year. In fact, I feel that you are ready to meet a special friend of mine...'

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

"I don't know, what do you want to do today?"

Break Glass in Case of Stress

'We want you to start working from home. And not for us.'

'I can't say I like your cavalier attitude Benson.'

"You got this, Nana."

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."