Comic Relief Lovers Pillows

"Cartonsit as a general rule, already work alone, usually at home."

A blimp falls in love with a fat man.

Please give! My Northpole Fund...Thank you!

'It was quite a relief when St. Peter clicked 'access granted'.'

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

You Are Here

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

"Touché"

'Tommy is in the other room playing with the triangle we bought him in Bermuda.'

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

The First Printed Bible

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"First, we'll look for repressed memories of malpractice suits."

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

Pecking order.

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

'No no!! Not that one... The BIG one on the top shelf!!'

My therapist cured me of using humour as a defense...these days I pack a .45.

Comedian faces audience of clowns: 'Ooh, tough crowd.'

"Your sins are forgiven, but not your co-pay."

Break Glass in Case of Stress

'You've come a long way with your anger this year. In fact, I feel that you are ready to meet a special friend of mine...'

"You're probably wondering why I called you. It's because I accidentally butt dialed you."

"I don't know, what do you want to do today?"

'I think I have aixelsyd.'