Comic Relief Connoisseurs Pillows

'You'll be happy to know that the meter reader and I have arrived at a mutual understanding.'

You Are Here

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"Oooh... Look, honey. Scarlet macaws! You know, they mate for life." "That's what you think."

Overjumpers

In a cycle - one bucket out, one bucket in.

"Brian's fine. He`s got his own coping mechanism."

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

Cat with Lion reflection in mirror

'It's the report from the consultant. He says we should turn over the turnovers to improve turnover.'

"Touché"

Though Mr. Frackman had yet to say a word, Bill sensed he was about to receive a particularly lousy performance review.

"We are gathered here to morn the passing of Bob Opossum."

'Tommy is in the other room playing with the triangle we bought him in Bermuda.'

The First Printed Bible

"That's where the pain gets me, doc."

"Yes, three of a kind beats two pair."

"Trust me. Don't do it."

"It says here on your resume that one of your qualities is a sense of humor. Care to elaborate?"

"Aren't we going a little overboard with Friday's casual dress code!?"

'To err is human... but to forgive is against company policy!'

'I think my teacher has a crush on me. She's holding me back for another year.'

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

"Saving Lois Lane a dozen times doesn't mean you can claim her as a dependent on your taxes."

Pecking order.

A kid squirting gunk from an umbrella.

When Holy Cows Are Sent Out To 'Pastor'.

'No no!! Not that one... The BIG one on the top shelf!!'

Comedian faces audience of clowns: 'Ooh, tough crowd.'

Tourist in the desert

"The good news is it's brightening up..."

"I don't know, what do you want to do today?"

'You've come a long way with your anger this year. In fact, I feel that you are ready to meet a special friend of mine...'

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

Break Glass in Case of Stress