Faithful Jokester Pillows

"Since we now have a leaking roof problem, it might be a good time to schedule baptisms."

"Prayer does work! I wasn't picked for any of the church committees."

"You don't understand, doc...Every time something goes wrong it's naturally MY fault."

'Some people are calling you a false prophet.'

"I should be mad, but that was an impressive hack."

'Don't worry it's safe, the baptismal is filled with hand sanitizer."

'I turned wine into water.'

'If you're a nun, where's your nunchucks?'

'The cross doesn't affect him. Let's try with a Star of David.'

'Bless me, Father - I'm a father.'

"Open Wide and say, 'aaaaa-men'!"

'No, he DOESN'T do penis enlargements!'

'What do you mean, your church didn't give you a password?'

Priest with the Pet Devil.

Duck hunter: 'UH-OH' A Duck hunter has accidentally shot down an Angel

'Listen, I obeyed more or less 25% of your commandments. Don't you think that I deserve a promotion or at least a little raise for that?'

'Well, there go all MY plans....'

"I imagine the men who wrote the Bible giggled every time they wrote 'I am the lord'."

"Year 40 in the desert...Moses loses it."

He's rehearsing his sermon. Ah, practicing what he preaches.

"If I might be serious for a moment..."

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

Fleas Navidad.

'While you're 'fixing' my private parts, could you give me a loaner pair?'

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Merry Christmas"

A crab with a utility knife claw

The Last upper: Novus Ordo Style

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

We're willing to flee temptation, if we can leave a forwarding address.

Mr Claus, tests indicate your blood is 95% milk and cookies.

'Haven't seen you in church lately John?'

How James and John became known as "Sons of Thunder".

Father Christmas uses laptop on roof. Man says: 'I think someone is stealing our wi-fi.'

"I've had. . . um. . . just a small sherry. . ."