Expectant Techies Gifts

Pregnancy and Laptops

Polly txt speak

The cell phone soother for life.

'As you can see, it's too late for a termination...Baby is capable of surviving outside the womb...'

Downloading Pregnancy

"I didn't say my prayers, but I e-mailed God earlier."

Smartphone Sonogram

'How nice. I didn't even know they had computers in nursery schools.'

Cybernetics Research Lab.

"Look, he's got his blanket. He's doing a secure search."

"Don't be out late and stay within Wi-Fi-range."

At the modern antenatal class.

"At which trimester will I be able to communicate with my baby via text?"

"Rayna, will you be my girlfriend?"

"We have a new app that does sin to atonement conversion."

"This app helps you create expletives during labor for reproach, vilification and revilement."

'Well, it's been nice talking to you, even if you are a recording.'

"Congratulations! You've downloaded a baby girl, have you given any thoughts to a username?"

"Hey - it says here that humans used to have these things called 'legs'. Apparently they used these legs to 'walk' to the shops and actually buy stuff in person...!"

"He needs his five-a-day."

CAN'T FIND CHARGER

"Next time I get my hair done, don't tell people I was out getting a software update."

"No, he's not crying for his bottle. That's his, 'I want a new phone' cry."

"Let's face it, no one, apart from Google, knows we're here."

'Now we come to step 86 of how to enter your new computer logins.'

Unborn baby texts his parents.

"Sure, buddy, I'll visit your website, but I won't accept your cookies."