Exercise Procrastinators Pillows

"Remember me? I'm your running shoes. Remember what running is?"

"I was going to chuck it all and go to Paris but I didn't have enough frequent-flier miles."

"I swapped my 'couch to 5k' training app for a '5k to couch' one!"

"Honey, I can't go to the gym today. I feel too out-of-shape."

"I'm exempt from the company fitness program. I have triplets at home."

"I tried the C25k but prefer the 5k2C"

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

'My arms are getting shorter.'

"I was all set to go to the gym, but you'd be amazed how much, yoga class and pour-a-glass, sound alike."

"Will I still be able to not exercise?"

'Busy Dear ?' 'Just watching my exercise video.'

Easy chair exercise machines

'Look! A rock hard body in 90 days!'

"Well, sometimes we take the dogs for a walk...which puts our fitness level at approximately that of an 80-year-old couple."

"Can you send me a detailed list of knee exercises I could do at home but won't because I have no discipline."

"The doctor told him to exercise more, so he jogs to the pub."

"What already?! If it weren't for my extraordinary willpower, I'd be exercising right now!"

"The doctor wants me to exercise more, so I need you to lift my feet even more when you're not vacuuming."

"Oh, man, I forgot to stretch, ever."

"It's Tuesday. Is there any point starting a new project so shortly before the weekend?"

'In that case I'll do nothing!'

Reasons to avoid training No. 2453

'... And this is the home gym, where we hang all our clothes.'

'This is my favorite machine in the gym.'

No, dear, I couldn't workout today, but I did do some strenuous selling and rigorous reinvestment!

'I know, I know. I know. It was my turn to change the water filter. You don't have to keep reminding me.'

"Well, my fitness band told my doctor how lazy I've been since my last visit. How do I turn on privacy on this thing?!!!"

'Don't strain yourself, make two trips.'

Break Glass in Case of Emergency

"Four out of five doctors recommend that you get up and get some exercise."