Executive Perks Enthusiast T-Shirts

'We can't let the total lack of profits impact bonuses.'

'Now that I have your attention...'

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Stock options for your thoughts."

Please sit down. I can give you five minutes.

'Ladies and gents, the executive-worker pay ratio is not what it used to be!'

You can fool some of the people all of the time - "Send in some of the people, Dorothy."

"If CEO pay packets aren't a problem, why doesn't everyone get one?"

"Where do you expect to be ten years from now?"

"The jury didn't buy my defense that CEOs just want to have fun."

'Enter His Royal Globalness...'

Boy in toy car talking on phone.

"No need to remind me. I'm well aware that I've forgotten completely about you."

'Interesting. At first, I didn't pick her as dominant.' - Child chairs meeting at Toys Inc.

"Profits. Good thing or the greatest thing?"

"It drives me MAD when people whine about the amount top management get paid. . ."

"You're an overweight, overpaid, over-the-hill senior executive, Dalrymple. What did you have in mind to remedy that situation?"

'Have you seen the ruddy margins the Chinese expect us to take up for this work?'

"Executive shoeshine and bald head buff, sir?"

"This new policy of resisting change is certainly innovative."

'Call me a cockeyed optimist but I still believe big executive bonuses and perks can buy happiness.'

'It's lonely at the top.'

'Another corporation I wouldn't have minded so much, but this was a hostile takeover by my secretary!'

"Not bad! ...For a duck."

"If you're going to grub for something, it might as well be money."

Man at important looking desk lined with quill pens gets ready to shoot one at a dartboard on his wall.

'So, she's decided to buy the helicopter.'

"Our founder was a real joker. That's the first silver dollar he ever glued to the floor."

"Patel confirmed"

"Sorry, that was the three cups of coffee, four cans of red bull, and double dose of Paxil talking."

'May I play through please?'

"It helps me stay focused on what matters most."

"I've got a lot on my plate right now. For starters, I need to sharpen my pencil, refill my coffee and get a new comb."

"Make yourself comfortable, Donaldson."

'It's pretty common among cruising executives, Mrs. Johnson... we call it non-jet-lag.'