Ethical Leader Gifts

"Follow me."

"What would Pope Francis, the mild-mannered shepherd of his flock, do?"

Correct Comics *Drawn By A Vegetarian On Acid-Free Recycled Paper In A Drug-Free Environment

"We'd better watch Cranston. He looks like a whistleblower."

'There's too much corruption in the third world.'

Personal Assistants.

"Welcome to the brave new corporate gulag, Hank. The dissenting wheel always gets the shrink!"

"It's not easy being green…"

"We used to do business more transparently, but it was too disturbing."

Arms Industry increases sales by 8.5%

'And get this: just when I thought the worst was over, the media blasts me for 'opportunistic, predatory business tactics!' Boy, did THAT sting!'

The Ekert Saga: 'Let's put it this way...can you imagine how the world would be if everyone actually practiced hat they preach about following the 'golden rule'?

"But if I don't know the corporate values then I'm not accountable to them."

"My management style is to hire good employees and then get out of the way while they work."

'Good news: First-quarter profits should be strong and second-quarter prison sentences should be light.'

'Sorry, but we already know who we're going to hire for our new ethics director. We just posted the job for show.'

"And Justin has been promoted to Head of Diversity."

"We're an oversight committee, but we do it more in the sense of overlooking."

Go and sin no more.

"The most moral consumer - Didn't shop at Walmart - Didn't order things on Amazon unless it was, like, an emergency - Tried to be vegan - Always had an extra canvas bag in her car (which was a hybrid, by the way)"

"I'll invest, but you must promise none of my money will go towards that Robert Mugabe."

Don't Leave Work Without It

'All this stuff's made in sweatshops - its awful! I'm not buying clothes someone's sweated on!'

'I majored in ethics. Several recruiters talked to me. They'd like me to do volunteer work.'

"Who are you going to listen to? Me, or the boss from hell?"

Authorities barge in on the cruelest kind of animal testing.

What's the idea taking up my parking space?

Congress. Situational Ethics Committee. When did they change that?!

You gave steroids to the 8-year-old girls on Team Caffeine? No sir! I merely enhanced their diet with a natural substance knows to boost strength and grit. What substance? You monster! Stay tuned

Let's be honest here, and admit we're targeting the stupid-with-their-money demographic.

New Year's Resolutions...1 Don't abuse my position at the center of the Financial System to make jaw dropping amounts of money while dragging the economy to the edge of the abyss and ruining the lives of thousands of innocent people 2. Lose weight

"I see no reason to worry about fine particles or climate change. On the contrary! I see a green future!"

"I'm all faux and loving it!"

"The idea that we get rid of whistleblowers is ridiculous...Ask Dr Glenn here if you don't believe me!"

Stop Animal Testing