Ethical Escapist Gifts

"Miss Perkins, send in a good cause. I feel an attack of ethics coming on."

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"I'd like to book 10 days going anywhere they've never heard of Brexit."

'I'm just going to go and slip into something more comfortable, like denial.'

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

'She got all the soap opera channels at a discount -- it's some kind of 'frequent cryer' program.'

'Man, I'm sick of thinking...can't someone flip on a T.V. or something?'

'Take down that stupid sign! It's giving me a headache!'

SEMINAR CANCELLED: Feel free to doodle.

Homing Pigeon GPS Manfunction

"You go on ahead. I'm going to hang out here for the next few months until everyone stops saying the word 'caucus.'"

'I wish you had chosen a more pertinent educational issue than 'Do Dogs Actually Eat Homework?''

"You know what you're running here, Lou? You're running a haven, that's what you're running here, Lou."

Kissing Hands

Man opens front door to find he's up in clouds.

"Not again!"

"He went that-a-way." (snail escapes).

"Do you ever have days when you just don't feel like designing jewelry?"

"And this brings to a conclusion, thank goodness, our broadcast day."

Dangerous tax audits.

Message in a bottle.

'If you keep running away, son, you'll never make it through your formative years.'

Free Thinking.

Sometimes you wanna go where nobody knows your name

Virtual Reality Check

"I have no problem with reality. It's just the occasional intrusion of gritty realism that I hate."

'A lovely area, but not enough waiters!'

"The floor is any human contact."

"Yo've got to be more specific, Ed. Wake you when what's over?"

ARchie Smith cartoonist

"Your essay on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your sister's"

Little girl playing pirates with her dog.

"My new favorite news station. . . non-stop, 24/7, 100% Trump-Free."