Ethanol Enthusiast Gifts

"If we build our own still to convert our corn to ethanol, we could become the middle man, too."

"Christmas - what a fuss eh?"

GAS PRICES AT PUMP

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

"I used to love power, but now I'm more interested in mileage."

"Moments like this make me glad I taught you how to fetch mojitos."

Politically Correct Snowperson

"I love you too, big guy."

God's Subcontractors

Sale! Weed Whackers

The eco club is starting a locavore movement here at school. "Loco" what? Eating fresh food, grown locally. So? So everyone eats healthier and uses less energy. Um � Ok. I'll tell my mom. Who are those people. Locobores.

"As an avid red wine drinker, I can say, with certainty, that the notion that drinking clarity impares claret is false!"

"Ikea for hippies" 1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood

"Our fresh seasonal hand-crafted brews contain a full serving of spring vegetables."

'We only serve menacing drunks here Sir, not small insignificant ones.'

Get your no-turkey recipes here! Eco club. Go veggie for T-day! No thanks! I like turkey, sausage, stuffing, creamed onions with bacon and mincemeat pie. I figured as much. How can you tell? Gut check. That's my gut reaction, too.

You said you wanted beer with hops !

Artist's Equipment Comes To Life

"I think we have run out of time..."

"It's ideal for the man who works close to home."

'Broccoli is biodegradable, you know, in case you want to throw it out before I eat it.'

'I'm going to try that 'vegan' thing, Joe -- give me some beer nuts.'

Apparently all our farts damage the ozone layer....

Climate Change

Another environmentally correct office product: The executive desk/organizer-fish ladder

Mom? Eco club is starting a campaign to eat local food. Good idea. Would you please pack me a lunch from organic stuff grown near here? Ok. I'm sure we have something. Thanks! Oh, boy. A beet sandwich.

"A pint for me and one for the woad!"

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

'I was dumped by my girlfriend.'

"We sing her to sleep with songs about recycling."

GAS. If you have to ask, you probably can't afford it.

"I can’t remember the last time he hugged me!"

Meanwhile, back on planet earth...Greenland's ice sheet is melting faster than previously thought, sea levels could rise..."

Plant Parenthood...