Estate Protector Gifts

"He intends to die with dignity, he desires a modest funeral, and he's determined to prevent the buzzards from getting any part of the estate."

Man to realtor: 'How much for a starter cubicle?'

"Enough with how great the public schools are. Just tell us – is there a Trader Joe’s nearby?"

Rare earths are the key to a greenwashed, technotopian future

The Environmentalist

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

"No Frodo, we are still many leagues from Mordor. This is from a wildfire by I-5 west of Bakersfield."

"I love you too, big guy."

Cat and dog at a will reading.

"As the executor for your mother's estate, let me say that she loved each of you, but she also loved Las Vegas."

Yeah, I know what you're talking about: humans have an unhealthy interest in my horn too...

The creature from the trailer by the dried-up lagoon.

Now I'm starting to get a little worried about this global warming thing.

Trump leaving

'The housing market may be flat, but pillow-fort construction is blooming!'

How did THAT get there? Wash me.

"Global warming is a great icebreaker."

Man sees sign stating dog for sale, house and land thrown in.

"It's the Environment's Agency's new H.Q."

Evolution.

The Cowboy Way; Doing the Right Thing

"We're counting on you to reverse this trend before this afternoon's investors meeting."

"Before vaporizing this one, we need to file an environmental impact report."

Please buzz off. That's my flower!

'I'm retiring soon and looking for something more comfortable...like a loafer.'

Building Site - Life Jackets must be worn.

The Reason Ed isn't mentioned in the bible.

For sale. Prime space under Jimmy's bed.

'He's going to be an estate agent, just like his Dad.'

Igloo for birds.

Global Warming Coming Soon!

"Its been on the market for over two years. The estate agent reckons it's something to do with negative edibility!"

"Yes!" "Excellent!" The Daily Bug City considers pesticides ban

"Would it kill you to compost?"

A sign on the front lawn of a house reads "Keep off the chemicals".