Escargot Entrepreneur Gifts

Snail in suit with briefcases.

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

"I'm expert at sniffing out blame."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"We're a very small international conglomerate."

'We've financed three more startups for no fathomable reason.'

"I used to want to be an astronaut, but now I think I'd rather be a billionaire space tourist."

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

"It's not my fault! The Russians must have hacked my brain!"

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

Cartoon about having many investors for crowd funding.

"And who, may I ask, is financing this startup country?"

"The chef made some substitutions to tonight's menu. Instead of Escarots a la Bourguignonne, he's cooking hot dogs."

'Wow, my own desk!'

"All that's left is inventing something insanely popular!"

'The company I ran was non-profit, but that wasn't intentional.'

'-but surely it's unusual to have nightmares with COMMERCIALS?'

This horse isn't dead. It's just sleeping.

'I decided to close the stand and sell the lemonade on eBay.'

"We're going to play the boss's favorite game - 'pin the blame on the scapegoat.'"

'The escargots are underdone.'

Mark Zuckerberg

Home for the Holidays

"The Internet has totally revolutionized the way white guys get rich."

"...Then she took the divorce settlement money...and set up a company that's putting me out of business."

"Miss Davis, bring me everything we've got on turning a two-bit hole-in-the-wall operation into a multinational juggernaut."

"I crunched the numbers until cautiously opportunistic."

SMALL BUSINESS LOANS, 'Your business plan seems to depend on winning a lot of state lotteries....'

"Ladies and gentlemen, start your companies!"

"How much do you need?"

"It's a new start up, a radical new way of printing money!"

"If I'm laid off, may I apply for a job at your start up?"

"I can recommend the snails, if you don't mind waiting."