Escargot Appreciator Gifts

"I've never heard of it, either, but nothing ventured, nothing gained, I always say!"

Gaston's Gourmet Truckstop

Grand Escargot at a Parisian Eatery.

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

Finally! A cure for the common cold!

"The chef made some substitutions to tonight's menu. Instead of Escarots a la Bourguignonne, he's cooking hot dogs."

Cat with Crown.

'You'll like this, sir. Instead of the usual boring bio, this year I've done your creation myth.'

"Dig deep! C'mon! You got this!"

'The escargots are underdone.'

"Dear, will you sprint down to the store and get a box of wheat germ and a pint of yoghurt?"

'Ocean sounds won't be heard, so that we may bring you a paid commercial program on offshore investment opportunities.'

"I can recommend the snails, if you don't mind waiting."

"Lost his first hat about nine months ago. Really tore him up too."

If students are more than a test score why aren't teachers?

"Can you keep a secret?"

Michelangelo's David

Today's Special: Escargot Appetizer

Exit laughing

Child found in the Street is Brought into Shelter at a Ragged School

'Nutcrackers! I take it this is the first time you've had snails, sir?'

'You did ask for the wine steward - now grovel, man, grovel!'

'Saline implants? That'd kill you! I'd take anything Rick says with a grain of salt- But I suppose that'd kill you too.'

'Yes, you're right... This dinner invitation from the French Embassy is highly suspicious!'

Snail ordering 'Hommes.'

Here Lies Bill Smith, Victim of a Mad Axe Murderer, Rest in Pieces

Snail Gumball Machine.

'That's right, sir - they ate the salad.'

"Of course I won. I was already a winner. I didn't even have to run the race."

The End.