Epitaph Enthusiast Gifts

Lawyer lists his billable hours on tombstone.

Wouldn't stop picking at it.

That Was Weird

He Watched Sports

John Ixon: Ran Out of Survival Tips.

The final reward for a writer... 'R.I.P. At last a deadline I can live with!'

A Few Slightly Irreverent Epitaphs.

A tombstone with an epitaph that reads "Tuned in, turned on, dropped out, dropped in, worked out, saved up, dropped dead."

Many are called I was chosen.

'There wasn't a damned thing I could do about it.'

"Still working on the screenplay."

Epitaph: Life is wonderful. Without it you're dead.

"Here lies...died on-line."

It was nature's way of telling me to slow down.

'Recline in Peace'

Jim Evans - Father, husband and darn good eatin'.

Devoted husband, loving father, savvy real estate investor

'Well, not his very last words, just his last words on twitter.'

The Graveyard of Ambition.

'He'll never hurt anyone again."

Sometimes I wonder what he meant by that. Wish You Were Here, Dear.

@noreplyguy. The inevitable.

Jerry was a salesman right to the end. Your ad here.

His last words were, "Stop correcting my grammar!" Here Lays Fred P. Smink.

RANDALL JONES (July 10, 1964 - May 17, 2019) - "Mostly Dicked Around On His Phone"

Connery, Sean Connery

Punctuation Police

'The next piece contains sex, violence, and Homeric epithets.'

Fenton G. Gonklemeyer, Computer Scientist - Booted Up 1928 and Crashed 2009.

"Bonk!"

Olden Day Battle of the Bands (Bard vs Sonnet).

Tomato's, Cucumber's, Apostrophe's.

I can't believe I ate all that kale for nothing.

Homer

"Catherine's gift to us tonight is her poetry."