Entering Professional Sports Gifts

'It's exciting and you make a lot of money, but if you don't win, they flush you down the toilet. Welcome to the pros, kid.'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

Football Fans

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

I can't decide. Should I go to soccer camp 3 weeks in a row? Or soccer, then baseball then lacrosse camp? 3 soccers. Isn't overspecializing at his age bad? Possibly. But 3 different sports means�buying 3 different sets of expensive equipment. Right, He does have a mean corner kick.

"Did you know that when my mom played soccer, only the winner got a trophy?"

"I wanted to be a baseball player 'til I found out they send you to the showers."

I love your enthusiasm, girls, but we're not opening a can of whoop-ANYTHING.

Perils of the double play.

"Winning isn't everything, Josh. Not being the reason your team loses is everything."

'We're looking for athletic people.'

Good luck tonight, xoxo, Coach.

Currently Boston

"Whaddya want for nineteen mil?"

I like what I'm seein' out there. This could be our year Wikowski.

"Gracie, I'm proud of you. Your team lost, but you tried your best and that's all that counts."

'You play ball with me and I'll play ball with you!'

'Billy! Set your homework aside and get down here. There's another basketball recruiter here to see you.'

'Here we go again...'

"And the way you kids kick ass today will speak volumes about the leaders of tomorrow you will be."

"Why so aloof in here? When you're on base, you yak your ass off with every Yankee in sight."

Table tennis.

"When you put on the uniform, you surrender a part of yourself."

'The owner plays in the NBA.'

Future Wrestler

"We would have won if it hadn't been for the other team."

'He'll be a great basketball player someday -- he already dribbles all over the place.

Olympics create interest in curling.

"We won again, and guess what? A Russian oligarch wants to buy us!"

'It's all right, miss, I'm only loking for our cricket-ball!'

"And for a left-handed designated hitter and a player to be named later, Mr. Steinbrenner would gladly fly Elián home."

"Amazing! It's a new world record folks!"

'There goes Finley...turning pro.'