Entering Dating Pool Pillows

"I'm recently separated from my significant other half."

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

Today, proud and accomplished the career woman re-enters the dating world, ready at last to meet the man of her dreams. . .

"And I never kiss in the first two seconds."

Tasty.

'It's hard finding a caring,sensitive and good looking man. Most of them already have boyfriends.'

"I don't remember him or the meal or what movie we saw. All I remember is I wore the right jeans."

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

"Don't make eye contact. Don't make eye contact. Don't...."

Man visits palm reader with 'Doing Anything Tonight?' written on his hands.

'Complements of the big smelly gentleman.'

Cards Blind Dating Game

"I fancy tall men."

"There's something different about you."

'Were you playing footsie with me?'

Speed Dating

"He's your type--gorgeous, successful, and totally unavailable."

'Yes, this is my first time at speed dating. Is it that obvious?'

'Nah! He's not my type.'

'My perfume? Actually, it's called 'insect repellent' but at the moment it doesn't seem to be working.'

Dorothy and the singles bar

"Having a dog is great for meeting more dogs."

'Get lost. Can't you see I'm with someone?'

"Not on a first date! That's fine by me, I've been on lots of dates."

Carol sensed some negative vibes from her date when he pulled out a laptop and began perusing other women's profiles.

"First date. You'd think she would have done something about her eraser."

"My mates at the showroom said that I should start dating again."

What star sign are you, let me guess...libra?

"Why is it sooo difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking. . . ?"

"So we're cool? We can go on a date?"

Tom Prepares for his Hot Date.

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"Actually, I'm not long back on the dating scene myself."

"Dude...Smiley wants to meet me for a burger...maybe it means she's hungry."

Computer dating.