Engineering Humor Fan Gifts

'...need to design something to bridge the generation gap.'

"The leadership team wants a catchy acronym for a new social media app they're calling Functional Applied Relationship Tracker. Any suggestions?"

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

"Hackers, Sire! They've broken through our firewall."

Man looking at sign that reads 'Hord Wark' and says: "I can't put that up. It's too much like hard work."

Tell me about your history. What are your interests? What kind of places do you visit? Are you careful? House of Java.net Cybercafe. You know what I mean: Are you the type that gets around? Your computer seems chaste. You may use it to send me an email. My laptop is virus-free. Freak.

'I think I've got a screw loose.'

Screw plastic surgeon.

I need a 10 foot board. That's 70 feet in dog feet.

'Yeah, but if it's NOT a mirage, maybe we can find Mapquest on it!'

"What - the customer complaints come in nonstop and the software doesn't work? Pheew... I'm relieved. I feared that something unusual happened today."

'We've simplified the control to 2 buttons - snooze and panic.'

Scaffolding being put together by glue.

'Well, now, let's just shine the light of common sense and linear thinking on this little computer problem of yours, shall we?' 'I'm not THAT desperate yet.'

"No need to set out traps, I'm leaving. You don't have Wi-Fi in this dump."

Cylinder Head

'Don't be silly, Ralph...of course you're not being replaced by a computer...you're being replaced by an electric paper shredder.'

'Floppy Disk Horror Movie.'

Men resting.

"And this, gentlemen, is what one of our typical American workers looks before he gets fired!"

"I just got a text from our smart garage door. It says: Oops, my bad."

Say No To Crack.

"So, that's twenty seven breakfast rolls, sixteen bacon sandwiches. . ."

Forklift truck

'This thing is airproof, right?'

'Reminds me, my urologist said there's something wrong with my plumbing.'

'Could I check my email?'

"So, General, what do you think of this new idea for a bridging technique?"

How to Cross the Rhine

'As a safety feature, I flattened one side.'

Car Carriage

'I didn't expect my own computer to stab me in the back.'

'The error message said I made an illegal entry, but I never suspected it was anything this serious!'

"Be careful - faecal recognition cameras!"

'Can you hear me in the back rows?'