Engagement Jokester Pillows

'Darling, may I have your hand in mirage?'

'Of course I'll still love you when you're old and skinny!'

'Why can't he just say 'I do'?'

'... And it's been ages since he last swashed his buckle!'

A couple dressed as a knife and a fork

'When I was studying animal husbandry, I met the animal who became my husband.'

'And thanks be to the lord that we're going out to eat on Friday...'

'Actually, I do mind wearing your pedometer!'

"Do you think someday we'll look back on this and laugh?"

"Remember when we talked about how you send mixed messages. . ."

'They were all out of roses.'

'Did you fart, sweetie?'

William, have I ever told you you're the wings beneath my wind?

'It's my wedding ring: My wife insists I wear it here to stop me flirting with other females...'

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

Speech-bubble-head-boy loves think-bubble-head-girl.

"Pretty impressive for a product of a 3-D printer."

"If you'll have me, I'd like to be your blind spot."

"I'm gonna talk to her. How's my breath?"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

'Todd don't be such a clown...'

"With other dates I've been on, long walks on the beach seemed like a cliche, but with you it really feels genuine."

'Darling, this is my ex. You know, the one I said you were twice the man of.'

"When I'm with you, Ted, I feel dirty."

"Well, he is at the age now here the repairs are starting to happen. Very quickly the cost exceeds the benefit. You better think about a new one."

'I now pronounce you hooked and booked.'

"My husband is missing. I haven't seen him since he started wearing camouflage clothes."

"If I'd known, I would've changed my vows to; Until bald and fat do we part."

'Why can't you just think irrationally every once in a while?'

'Why Walter!! Are you getting fresh?!!'

"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."

'Mom, would you have married Dad if you had seen him in high definition first?'

'When I said that I'd 'give you a ring', I meant on the phone. . .'

"If we're to have a serious relationship Nigel, you must stop ringing my bell and running away."

'Honestly, I didn't mean any of those things I wrote about you in my diary last night!'