Emergency Dramatist Gifts

I know they told me not to bark

"All our extras are ex-soccer players - they're the best at dramatically faking injuries."

Could you send a plumber out? I think the washers have gone!

A man taking a bow

"Less hair doesn't mean less work!"

"The medic said he died of an ST-segment-elevated myocardial infarction -- Jack was always a showoff."

'Let me through, let me through, I'm a computer geek.'

Now Playing On Your Phone: Other People's Craft Projects....

'We have an emergency, ladies and gentlemen! We need help - can anybody in the audience play the tambourine.'

"Did someone just shout 'sinkhole!!!'?"

"It's a profit and loss statement. Read it with gusto!"

'I called this emergency meeting to discuss the lack of respect I've been getting around here lately.'

'Let's face it, we never got along. I'm just sorry it had to come to this.'

"Her ladyship isn't in—wait, yes, no—so sorry, she's out."

'I'm leaving this damn job at the end of the month.' - 'How did you find out?'

'My client's defense is that the bank was an attractive nuisance.'

"It was touch and go for a while, but he's out of the woods now!"

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

'Never mind the dramatics, Watkins. Just read the treasurer's report.'

"I can't approve of your office gossiping, Frank...and after you tell me the latest I want it to stop!"

Stretcher Header.

"Where's the fire, pal?"

'One day, this will make a wonderful metaphor.'

'Not another tough crossword puzzle.'

"911? My husband's unresponsive."

"I hate it when he stand at the window, takes a deep breath and says...THE CITY!"

"Okay wait, it just came in. I guess he did text for help."

"What makes you think I'm the whistleblower?"

'Good luck with your new job...we all know how much you'll miss the old one.'

'Emergency - put me through to the yoga club immediately!'

A bureaucrat works under fear of punishment.

Have I told you about my operation?

'OK, Mrs. Huber. Why don't you step over here and start trying on some of these, and we'll make your case iron-clad.'

Man raised flag of drowning women.

"Universal healthcare? Yes! I believe everyone has the right to all the healthcare I can bill them for."