Elderly Parent Gifts

"Mom said Dad pulled a groin playing hockey. When will he realize he's not 60 anymore."

Geezer crossing.

Next rest area 8 feet

"Don't worry - the Power of Dad still trumps the Power of Attorney."

"He should be up and complaining in no time."

'It's ok Joe, forget it!'

"Oh, you know, I have good days and bad days."

"My service animal for Alzheimer's, sonny!"

"Are you too old to remember all the advice you tried to give me when I was too young to care?"

Aging Aliens

"Wow, I can smell something far beyond the expiration date!"

Every so often, Madeline gets carried away.

Old lady sitting on a stairlift ascending to the gates of heaven.

Elderflower

"He just doesn't know what to do with himself since he passed away."

"Yes, I have had problems with bedwetting before...but the previous time I was five!"

Domestic violence against the elderly

"Pst! There's an acid indigestion party in B'wing on Friday..."

"I brake for no reason"

Beware of buying bargain 'Wrinkle remover kits' from Ebay.

'The problem is he's 98.6...It's his age.'

'I thought you said you were only collecting fortnightly from now on.'

'Gone out your dinner is in the food blender'

"Since you're going shopping, I've made a little list of a few things I need. . ."

"You don't have OCD or ADD. You have OLD."

"I think I'm losing my memory."

"They no longer call it Last Rites because they can keep on coming back and do it again. I think the new name for the sacrament is Annoying of the Sick."

Seniors Op-Shop

Toothless Meal

'I'm fighting ageing.'

Next one along in 15 minutes.

"I never thought you'd live to be 90 either. By the way, you're only 67."

'Terrible pile-up. One of the Zimmer frames jack-knifed...'

"How’s your arthritis? All your tools are for opening jars."

"You really miss the old grandfather, don't you dear."