Economics Jokester Gifts

'I'm not surprised, have you see the price of headstones lately?'

"...And when the world economy collapses, we all stand up and take over! Agreed?"

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

'Pretty strange term, market share, considering the whole object is not to.'

"The fish - will it be the market price at the time of ordering, the time of eating or the time of paying?"

"No, it hasn't, but when the sky does fall your investments are going to do very, very, well.''

"Good to see they're trying to keep the high street vibe."

Aliens - 'We heard stuff is cheap here.'

Trickledown economics

'We can't move in with my parents - they've moved in with grandma!'

Office of economic forecasting.

Escaping Black Hole - '..But captain that's the pensions black hole there is no escape!'

"Let's vote. All those in favour of flying to Switzerland, withdrawing our secret bank account and splitting?"

"The first thing we should do is get you two into a good mutual fund. Let me get out the 'Magic 8 Ball' and we'll fun some options."

'How are you at takeovers?'

And if you help drive the herd all the way to Kansas City, you get to keep one steer for yourself! The first stock option.

'It's the NEW Chinese Stock Market Report.'

'Oh dear. I seem to have put the decimal point in the wrong place again.'

A rising tide may lift all boats but I sank all my savings in beachfront properties.

'Today the stock market closed early so money managers could take time to stop and smell the profits.'

'We buy and sell them.'

"We can't just pluck figures out of the air any more. . . We use a bucket."

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

"I have your evaluation...great teamwork, great morale...basically, you're a good dog."

'You call it a beer belly, I prefer to think of it as a lump sum settlement of liquid assets.'

'Consumer confidence is up.. in the 'Money in the mattress' sector.'

Grand Opening and Closing Down Sale simultaneously occurring.

'Someday, Son, all of this will be yo....!'

Government Handouts.

'Great! Thanks to the damn mortage crisis, we've got to live in a neighbourhood now where we wake up with yellow feet every second morning...'

"That man's a legend in this office. He has 100% accuracy in predicting the past."

"Well, if I was ambitious, we'd have a nice house and more money, but I'd never be around."

"We'll double our chances of recovery if we buy two lottery tickets."

Luck of the IRS.

"Tag! Your salary's frozen."