Eccentric Storyteller Gifts

Uncle Juan

"Ok, here he comes, remember the story, I've had a bad asthma attack..."

'...I already have 26 cats, why not 27...'

"I'm not weird I'm a 'person of weirdness'."

Use your imagination.

"But how do I accomplish that in 140 characters or less?"

"Avant-garde jazz hands"

On-the-job creativity may go unrewarded an may even create consternation among co-workers.

'...and when the wolves moved house I was adopted by beetles.'

Cocktail party with man balancing drink on head as he eats.

There's a Facebook group for everyone... "Even Toilet Paper Mummies!"

"Personally, I of course loved Uncle Clarence, but Mr. Quibbles wants to say a few things."

The summer of her 39th year, Eleanor could be found most evenings on a hill (known locally as Robert's Hump) doing aerobics of her own devising.

'Don't you ever knock?'

"Pat's independently wealthy and dependably entertaining."

It's a good thing our neighbors don't know what weirdos we are.

'He swallowed some of his acrylic paints and now he's artsy fartsy.'

'Yes, yes, Rupert, you are still a mighty hunter. Now, please bring the turkey back to Luisa in the kitchen.'

Buider, "How crazy do you want this paving, mad,or completely wacko?"

"Rapunzel? Rapunzel moved out years ago. I'm Bruce, and I have a stack of old newspaper clippings I'd like to show you."

"You there - shoo!"

"I made it myself. It's a lava lamp."

'Did you ever wonder why iced coffee is goof but cold coffee isn't? . . . You're not curious like I am.'

"So that's my presentation: Could I have 100 million for the startup?"

'Agghh...I've done something practical, taken up by industry...and I've been thrown out of the Mad Scientist Club!'

"Why can't you just read in bed?"

'Ah, Baker! Still the company's lone voice in the wilderness, I see!'

"Come at me, Bro!"

Tom Waits.

"He's nuts. She's nuts. All three young ones are nuts. The dog is nuts. And the old lady upstairs is nuts, too."

Mum, Dad, I've met something...

"I'm waiting in for a plumber."

"My left buttock is noticeable larger than my right and my dog is missing his hind legs."

Artist painting his brush instead of model.

"Travis didn't believe in nouns."