Earthquake Experts Gifts

'It's always a little dicey using tectonic plates.'

Another long day down at the Bureau of Earthquake Prediction.

The Tectonics and Their Plates.

Pull the udder one

"You know what I think, babe? Seven on the Richter scale."

"When I kiss you the earth moves. Or was that just an aftershock?"

"Would you mind adjusting the vibrate on your phone? There's a seismologist on TV claiming there's been an earthquake in our neighborhood."

'What it all means is, ker-booom!'

"Once again, the epicenter seems to be Christian Slater."

'He's our new Bone Specialist!'

Fracking Zone - Be prepared for anything.

Mrs. Richter's Scale.

Safety first - be aware of what is around you.

'I am prosecuting you for a breach of article 5 of the explosives act, storing black powder in a dangerous manor on unlicensed premises.'

My husband is a world expert, but unfortunately it's only on maganese bronze.

Oil on Mars.

"Should't we have a better backup system in case our monitoring equipment goes down than a bowl of jello?"

"I failed driver's ed....Apparently there's like this rule about rear-ending a police car!"

"Here it is - 'Surviving an Earthquake'..."

Fissure waxing - Department of Seismology.

A Vet? I had you picked in advertising.

"You've got to help me, Tom... my garden is out of control!"

"An earthquake cracked the building in half. I'd have it fixed, but it's keeping the staff from constantly going to the break room."

'WOW,this is amazing down here captain, ABSOLUTELY amazing! That quake SURE did a lot of damage to the ocean's floor!'

Now do you see the point of regular electrical checks?

'Pretend you don't notice San Andreas.'

Tear Along this Line.

When geologists argue.