Earring Enthusiast Gifts

"Mr. Van Gogh's mother let him cut off his whole ear, and you won't even let me get mine pierced."

At the rock concert...

"The doctor thinks I need a hearing something or other."

'I can't figure out why I keep getting wind knots.'

'Dude, you can go for that new diving gear if you want, but if you ask me, I think it's a trap.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

Shore fishing requires threading the needle.

Older lady to husband surrounded by dogs: 'Still getting feedback from your hearing aid?'

'I hope you don't mind, dear — I got my ears pierced.'

"You know what, let's go with the pearl earring."

Health news - hearing loss is irrelevant.

'Fersteimer believes in strictly minding his own business.'

"I'll knock 10% off this session as I wasn't really listening."

A Message from Your Fishing Buddies.

Odd Angles, a monthly strip on coarse angling

Dry Cleaning

'Dried meat, survival set, folding spade... okay. Now I'm ready to go shopping with you.'

"Stop right there, it's my stockbroker: I have to take this!"

Earplugs £2 a Pair

Flying Ear Specialist

Do not take fish by unathourized means.

'Nothing is biting, let's take a lunch break on that island.'

'Good morning, and welcome to the National Symposium on Inner Ear Disorders.'

Blow Up Christmas Tree

The Official Talking Christmas Tree in Dress For Excess

'What's it this time?'

"I talked to my son for nearly twenty minutes last night before I realized he had his earbuds in and never heard a word I said!"

'He hasn't done anything yet, it's just with all this gear on, he can't stand up!'

'Other than your choice of ring tone, I can't find anything wrong with you.'

Ok, go back through and twist behind me. Then I think we're done. Your Earbuds While You Sleep.

"Keep going Hank, you almost have it."

"Remember me? You caught me on the Beaverkill, opening day, 1952."

"The music is starting, Tonto! Come on, let's ride!"

"We're never going to get this tree decorated, if we keep pawing at the ornaments."