Ear Enthusiast Gifts

'Everything's a tradeoff - now that I can walk upright, I can't wiggle my ears any more.'

'No, I don't think it's tinnitus.'

'Good morning, and welcome to the National Symposium on Inner Ear Disorders.'

'I think you'll find that I'm a very good listener.'

'He looks like a taxi-cab... with both doors open!'

Laryngologist

'I'm going to drag my sled up and down the sidewalk until the noise drives nature crazy and it snows.'

At the rock concert...

Future garbage truck driver.

"The doctor thinks I need a hearing something or other."

"I'll stop when I'm good and ready to."

My other cello is a Stradivari

'... and the winner for 'The Noisiest Picture of the Year' is...'

"Tong!"

Artist and Musician

'He likes a room where he can reverberate.'

'I can tell you one thing, Madam. These ears have been neglected...

"Our kids may like your giant soundbar, but the neighbors seem to have a different opinion."

"Albert is the first whistler to use hearing aid feedback as an intro to one of his tunes."

'You haven't heard anything yet!'

'Don't forget to take your tranquilizers Daddy, little Jimmy is coming round to play.'

"Come up and purr in her other ear... she likes the surround sound."

'I told you we should have gone wireless.'

Wake the eff up with the official New York City alarm clock. Choose your distress signal: car horns, sirens, barking, heat pipes, mouse feet. Guaranteed to disturb!

People bell ringing - 'RING TONES'

Older lady to husband surrounded by dogs: 'Still getting feedback from your hearing aid?'

The sounds of a tree falling in the forest.

"Threatening to call the Noise Abatement Society isn't being very romantic, Sydney."

Leaf-Blowers: Loudly making yardwork someone else's problem since the 1960s.

'The cannon will go off every 20 minutes just to make sure you're paying attention,'

Library Grand Opening

Playing dustbins

"Vuuuuuuuuuuu!"

"The sea waves on my sound machine are attracting a following."

The Gong