Driving School Staff Gifts

'Was that a red light? You should know that it is highly unethical to take liberties just because the instructor is drunk...'

'Remember: mirror, signal, manoeuvre...'

'You call that teaching?'

Adult Courses. It's so hard keeping the information from different classes separate! I'm talking film history and psychology. I failed a test because I said a "psychopath" is the walkway Norman Bates took home. I also confused geography and aeronautics. I said the "great plains" are located at an Air Force testing base in the California desert. My worst nightmare was confusing the thinks ti learned in driver's education and statistics. But at least I now know it's driving where you must st

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

Some cars need a backseat steering wheel.

Sometimes Y Turn

Caution (arrow falling from sky sign)

Caution May Contain Nuts.

'If mum's not around, amber means...pedal to the metal, baby!'

Street signs you don't want to see.

"When the slowest car in the fast lane don't go any slower than the fastest car in the slow lane."

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

'We finished all the repairs in the cafeteria kitchen this morning, but the food still tastes lousy.'

Lost around a military base.

'Before we begin, please turn off all cell phones.'

'That's hydroplaning for ya.'

Learner Driver

Man helping a mini learner driver

Safe Driving.

'No, first start the engine, then bark!'

Steep learning curve ahead.

"That's not what I meant by changing gear, Mrs.Robinson!"

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

"No, I don't think you 'new break shoes', I think you need new break feet. You are supposed to depress the brake pedal you know."

"Yes, next year you'll be moving from classroom to classrooms, and, no, it doesn't count as PE."

Back to school: The Horror,

'Morning Larry, taking the kids to school? Have you still got the duck farm?'

'The penguin is upset...'

Motorway Madness And Urban Roadrage Directions

Caution, Student Self-Driver

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'