Driving School Admin Gifts

"Okay...when the light turns red, you stop. When the light turns green, you go."

Ethics exam cheater.

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

"No Timmy, I don't think your pencil has system requirments or upgrades you can download from the internet."

I will study my speling words...

'As a beginning teacher, you know you come here prepared to teach and become a good teacher. As you gain experience, you will learn that you also come here to care and become a great teacher.'

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

'From six to to eighteen, they're always at that age.'

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

'The school bus drove off without me. The driver said she couldn't allow one more peanut butter sandwich on her bus.'

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

'I had no idea aspirin came in such a large bottle.'

'Simpson! Stop causing low-level disruption in class now!'

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

Kangaroo mom to child, 'We're not going anywhere until you buckle-up, young man.'

'The school computers are six months old. How can I be expected to be competitive in the job market if I'm trained on obsolete equipment?'

"Is there any way I could get a dashboard instead of a report card?"

"Isn't there an app for this?"

Yummy Mummies

'WE use these computers to gather and organise data for our school district and, on a slow day, to play solitaire.'

'I'll give your note to my parents but our family policy is to never negotiate with terrorists.'

Some cars need a backseat steering wheel.

"I didn't say my dog ate my homework. I said Russian bots ate my homework."

"How can I be a lead learner without the technology needed to lead?"

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

Sometimes Y Turn

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

'School was really exciting today -- they busted up a meth lab in chemistry class.'

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

'This handheld computer is very useful for teaching. It displays my lesson plan, calander, key files, and an extensive menu of put-downs for hecklers and classroom clowns.'

"Get up at 7; leave for school by 8; no video games until after homework is done -- how about some regulatory relief?"

Street signs you don't want to see.

The Re-Opening of Schools