Drinks And Laughter Seeker Pillows

'Oi, you lot, I don't want any funny business.'

Sympathetic nursing will work wonders

Bad fake tan day.

"That'll be five bucks."

The only time cats are known to laugh.

"Don't you just hate restaurants that make you feel rushed?"

"Just because we're hyenas doesn't mean we always have to get Laughing Cow cheese."

Would you be willing to sign something regarding the fat content of your burger? Like what? My colon.

Santa does a keg stand.

'Ben just fired my ten guage goose gun. He should be coming back this way any minute now.'

"What did Jesus order?"

Wet Cement. Always the joker, aren't you, Ernie?

'No Fred, this one is one me!'

"I'm not a doctor, but I don't think the problem is with your bladder, Bob."

"Projectile hairballing."

Drunk Barber

'When Johhny told everyone he was going to be a comedian they all laughed...'

"Hey! Get back here!"

he used to belong to a cartoonist

'Because I'm so sick of those movies, now go get me a romantic comedy.'

'When Einstein wrote about time and relativity he must have been watching a football game where the last 30 seconds took two hours.'

Bald Man Overcomb

"I've always wanted to do this - 'knock, knock...who's there?'"

Football heads...

'Ha, ha! But seriously folks...'

"Ok. . . who added the yellow?"

Ask Sadie

'I don't understand. Why do you want to have your arms extended?'

Comedy Store - Canned Laughter delivery.

"From here on out it's term and conditions."

'He's not in now. This is his secwatawy.'

Frank and Ernie's Classic Cars. '40s - '50s - '60s. Hi! Do you have any cars with fins in the back? Sorry, sir, nothing with Fins in the back -- but there are a couple with Norwegians in the trunk!

"Will you stop comparing me to your mum!"

When Stupid People Get an Idea

Well, that was a total waste of time!