Driftwood Collector Gifts

'Most of the time it's nobody's fault. People just sort of drift apart.'

Wildlife

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

"This is going to make the most amazing driftwood table."

The aliens froze, gripped by a primal fear. This time there would be no abduction.

"The most I'll splurge on my diet is on a boneless, skinless carrot."

Cow's straw

NYer uploaded by mod - "Come look, hon! We just got a new cactus!"

Man with raked leaves on wall plaques.

"No, dude. Smoke the grass first. Then eat the candy."

"Hey! Plants are on sale again! Woo-hoo!"

"I don't know the Latin, but the common name is climbing onion."

"You might want to start bringing more carrots home, dear. I think I have an ingrown hare."

Teapot

Bearded Leftie.

'Have a nice day, Dear.'

The Frankenstein snowman.

"And I get a really, really tall straw?"

'The nice thing is we can use real carrots as incentives with them.'

'Listen up troop. We're going on a treasure hunt.'

A tree cries its leaves off like tears

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

'Do you mind if I take a straw?'

'Of all the fern bars in Encino, she's gotta walk into mine.'

'I'm doing like you said and not drinking straight from the carton.'

"I'll see your two and raise you three."

A man with a rake on a desert island

Everything's coming up roses!

Florist delivers Cactus to Man on Bed of Nails

Flytrap nerd.

"It says here...'palm tree'." (landscape)

The vegan hunter

'He's so proud - We've got the best collection of weeds in the street!'

'It's almost time to get the cross-country skis out and dust them off.'