Dressage Aficionados Gifts

"I hate dressage: executing those complex steps in front of an audience is so overwhelming..."

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

Before her first dressage competition, Kate suffered from Pre-Traumatic Stress.

'So....how many hours were you practising half pass this morning?'

'You two, sort it out!'

'Stop fooling around, I can hear my dad coming out of the shower...'

'I will be a chaperone at the senior prom. I need a prom dress but I don't want to be mistaken for a student.'

'I know you're falling for her, but be careful. Remember: Love is blinders.'

Man Diverts the Hunt...and hides the fox!

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

'How many times have I told you to not call while I'm in the middle of a competition?'

I can't wait till they get one of those things...

"I signed up for 'Dressage Without the Horse.'"

Don't laugh. It's added three points to his scores.

'Cream?'

'You promised me a night of unbridled passion!'

Chess - Knight got off his horse to have a wee.

'I wouldn't be seen dead in a cardboard coffin!'

'In and out! In and out! Get it right ponies because in the real event you also have a human to look after!'

'Isn't he a little young for sideburns?'

'Honestly darlings I don't know how you can spend so long looking at shoes.'

Dressage

'I'm going to take a wild guess and say 'dressage'.'

'Dressage?! But Son, what about something more virile like Rodeo or Polo?'

'Maybe you're sitting on the wrong end.'

Doesn't he seem really stiff?

Boy and horse rider

Friendly sports arguments with barbers.

'That's it Robert, this fancy dress thing has finally gone too far!'