Dressage Aficionados Gifts

"I hate dressage: executing those complex steps in front of an audience is so overwhelming..."

Shaggy dog/Shaggy Owner.

'This goes way beyond just keeping the flies off me...I'm fighting crime now too!'

"I'm so looking forward to the weekend, there's a show on: We're going to be pampered and they'll put lovely ribbons in our manes..."

'You do a fine job guarding the place, we just need you to shed less.'

"Okay brother Bickle, you can keep your underpants on"

I just want to look natural. You know, like a movie star.

Before her first dressage competition, Kate suffered from Pre-Traumatic Stress.

'So....how many hours were you practising half pass this morning?'

'I will be a chaperone at the senior prom. I need a prom dress but I don't want to be mistaken for a student.'

'What?... You wanted your horse SHOD!?'

'You two, sort it out!'

Man Diverts the Hunt...and hides the fox!

'Stop fooling around, I can hear my dad coming out of the shower...'

'I know you're falling for her, but be careful. Remember: Love is blinders.'

'How many times have I told you to not call while I'm in the middle of a competition?'

"I signed up for 'Dressage Without the Horse.'"

I can't wait till they get one of those things...

Don't laugh. It's added three points to his scores.

'Cream?'

So, what disturbing topic would you like to talk about today, Al? How about your new combover, Doctor?

'I wouldn't be seen dead in a cardboard coffin!'

Chess - Knight got off his horse to have a wee.

'Isn't he a little young for sideburns?'

'You promised me a night of unbridled passion!'

'Honestly darlings I don't know how you can spend so long looking at shoes.'

'In and out! In and out! Get it right ponies because in the real event you also have a human to look after!'

Dressage

'I'm going to take a wild guess and say 'dressage'.'

'Maybe you're sitting on the wrong end.'

Doesn't he seem really stiff?

'Dressage?! But Son, what about something more virile like Rodeo or Polo?'

'That's it Robert, this fancy dress thing has finally gone too far!'

Boy and horse rider

'Are you playing hoofsie with me?'