Draughtsman Gifts

'The Ailing Matisse tries cutting out meat and dairy products.'

Hans Holbein

Drawing board disaster.

David Hockney

'Give up this crazy dream of being an artist, Paul. You have good taste and you're a brilliant draughtsman, it wouldn't work out.'

David Hockney

David Hockney

AUGUSTUS JOHN

Architect chained to his drawing of parliament

'C'mon get it straight.'

Shoe Shine/Lace Tie

"I haven't a clue what it does, but I don't know I managed without it"

'My mom's the greatest surgeon this side of Mayo brothers.'

'I found the termites!'

Sweep the board.

'I'm designing a robot that'll do my drafting homework for me,'

"Lovely dovetail."

Arts and crafts

Welcome Association of Stage Builders.

Artist's Equipment Comes To Life

Waiting for retirement.

"So, how did the audition go?" "Great! I really nailed it."

I love embroidery

'You must be the only 'Jack-of-all-trades' who is out of work in all of them!'

'Frankly, I prefer the monkey's plans.'

Hammer and chisel discussing what they've been doing, chisel says; 'Oh you know, getting into a few scrapes.'

'All right!! Bull's-eye!'

"And you've had this headache since you left the pub last night?"

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Education and Apprenticeships

Lady throws dart to decide which soap opera she's going to watch.

'Don't worry, the first 30 years of being a painter are the hardest.'

Multitool Knife

Timber preservation

"Well, you certainly seem to have a lot to offer this company, and, of course, the truffles are a hell of a plus."