Domestic Illusionist T-Shirts

'Hey, 'Houdini', after you figure out how to levitate the cork ou tof the bottle, I can use your magic at the kitchen sink.'

"It seemed like miles to me!"

"Keep your glasses on. It will look like twice as much."

"Just ignore it. It's a mirage."

'It's Blurred.'

Best Special Effects Award

"Here's my wallet, my phone, the key to the safe and an application form for your so-called 'mind control device.'"

A man with notches in his nose for his glasses.

'My doctor wants me to watch what I eat, so I'm here for glasses.'

MD to patient: 'So, it's a little fuzzy and you're seeing spots?'

"Well, it does make the room look larger."

It shows off your astigmatism very nicely.

'Those artificial flowers look so lifelike it's unusual.'

'This is Muriel's kitchen, where the magic happens -- you know, Voodoo and stuff like that.'

Book and magician

',,,and she had the nerve to say I needed new glasses,'

'We find this miniature rock band helps the illusion of a live band experience.'

Alien Magician

Painting leaves onto a window.

'Ooh, look at Ned. He must be practicing for some sort of shadow puppet competition.'

'Wow, it's just like the photo.'

Dobbson's False Doorway Company A man has walked into an actual painted Trompe l'oeil False Doorway and has got knocked out .

'Wow, now there's a talented mime artist; he really looks like he's falling.'

Badly Drawn. Please Photoshop.

"It's the greatest diet. You eat all you want. Then you let them stretch you with Photoshop."

"It works!"

"All those close-up magic classes don't seem so 'worthless' on day 190 of quarantine, do they."

'Don't worship me.' 'I've lost a contact lens.'

"For God's sake, Mr. Danvers, work with me here!"

"For my next trick, I will try to meet a deadline during daylight hours."

'Instead of going somewhere, how about we just Photoshop our vacation this year?'

'Alright. But it better be good.'

Don't Push: Electrical Shock.

Magician with a pound sign above a 'SOLD' house

Prisoner escapes into his own painting.