Domestic Humor Fans Pillows

Search engine used to find missing sock.

'Have you seen my hot water bottle?'

"Read the baby page instead."

"Adam, how many times do I have to tell you to put your laundry in the basket!"

Hair blower.

"Evidence suggests she was working on the puzzle, got up to make tea, husband enters and puts last piece in..."

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Were we expecting a baby?"

"See that stain? My wife did that, not me. All her, totally her fault."

"You're crappin' in the closet again, Claude."

"Mulch madness"

"And remember, woman... I'm the one who wears the sassy pastel yellow toreador pants in the family!"

"I knew we agreed that you could be a stay-at-home dad, but that's when we decide to have children."

"And I suppose you forgot to bring home the milk."

'... And your wife says; don't bother looking for the key to the drinks cabinet, because she's hidden it where you'll never find it.'

'Say, Hon. . . the pizza's burning.'

'How many times do I have to tell you about putting the toilet seat back up?'

"The blow drier is broken."

'He'll do the dishes now that I've attached an accelerator.'

"We need a new stove. This one's beginning to burn oil."

"Life is so much easier since I brought the XL Robovax for Clive."

There were a million things Alexander Hamilton hadn't done

'Maybe putting 'Sleep 20 Hours A Day' first on the list wasn't such a good idea.'

'Certainly you may come in for a drink. You live here.'

'I'm really thirsty.'

'Harold, I told you not to eat the last piece of pie!'

"I told you not to leave without taking out the garbage!"

"Hang on, I'll get him for you."

"I'll be on the porch, pushing ninety."

His and Hernia's towels.

"I’ve changed my mind. I no longer want to conquer the world. I just want to conquer those two..."

"Add Your Own Caption Week # 222"

"Please don't go!"

"Quit with that racket - you're scaring the fish."

Hi love...one less for tea tonight