Domestic Dispute Coach Gifts

Man umpires a fight with his wife.

"I really miss being in a committed relationship, Randy." "Which part do you miss most?" "Having someone disagree with you over what you're going to eat, or over what TV shows you're going to watch? Or do you miss having to account for how you spend your time? Or having to explain why you bought yourself something awesome without first getting permission?" "Mostly I miss the back rubs. They don't ask you to wash the dishes first at massage parlors."

Information...political rhetoric

'The only cuts we can all agree with are their cutting remarks!'

Tonight: Town Hall Meeting. With free speech, sometimes I think that you get what you pay for!

Always Compatible

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

"It's something new I've been trying. Social scientists call it 'Productive Disagreement.'"

"You might want to save that for your blog."

Next Wave Collegiate Sports

When Someone Says Biden Sucks, You Are Supposed to Have a Good Answer

"We're too tired to argue. Let's let Siri and Alexa handle this for us."

"I'd appreciate a little more reacting to my ranting."

Scouse For Beginners

Heavy-duty, super-capacity, two speeds, 10 cycles. All of them vicious.

Be objective - never take your own side in an argument.

Political Debate, 'I'd like a word with the debate chairman.'

Ever wonder why we debated what color fridge to buy?

"The people will not tolerate people speaking on behalf of the people any longer!"

"We should never have committed binary fission!"

'I loved your argument. When are you planning to perform it again?'

"I'm sorry, you must have me confused with someone that does yard work."

Rishi Sunak interrupts Liz Truss in leader's debate

"I'm going to be a lawyer so I'll be arguing both sides."

A man holding a pro-life sign stands above a group of beaten people who are pro choice.

'Actually it's not the first time I've seen a political candidate do that.'

"Vote for me!"

'...and when I did finally take out the trash, she locked the door behind me.'

"Dad, I need $5 for the annual debate team adventure camp."

'Governor game change and his replacement debate moderators...'

"... and don't forget to clean out the garage and attic... and the gutters need to be..." "Put a sock in it, Sally. You knew I wasn't an eager beaver when you married me."

'Well, if you insist on using logic I see little point in continuing this argument.'

"Vince prides himself on his open mind, and you'd be suprised at some of the things that crawl into it."

'I didn't even know she was angry until she started shooting.'

'No talking politics during `happy hour`!'