Domestic Disaster Diva Pillows

Father-in-law - Break glass in case of emergency

Domestic Superheroes!!

Lady using paint roller as rolling pin for baking dough.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

"Someone once told me that kids grow up so quickly. I hope there's some truth to that."

"In my house, 'dirty dancing' means it's time to mop the floor."

'Honey, where's my cell phone?'

"Honey, do these sweatpants make me look like I prefer we stay in tonight so I can watch the game?"

Schubert's Unfinished Basement

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'Congratulations, dear! Your home cooked dinner was so good you'd think it was an expensive frozen entree!'

Housewife feeding her washing machine with a brief.

"I call it 'rage loaf'."

Balancing work and family

"Really! How many 'How to Survive the Festive Season' articles does one man need?"

'Will you be long, fixing this leak? I'll have to put my Bert's dinner on in ten minutes.'

Things my vacuum likes to suck up

"I had to skip my workout."

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

Ironing day.

'Your house is spotless, your children are well behaved and dinner was delicious. How do you do it?'

'Sure, I'm a working mother - is there any other kind?'

"John, wake up, I think the mattress has stopped breathing."

'Your CV says in your last job you were responsible for...'

Washing Line Walker

Woman has 3 towels in her restroom: 'Mine', 'Mine' and 'Mine'.

Couple who have confused their baby's pram and the lawn mower.

"1. Flimsig used pallets, old foam 2. Stinkum goat wool 3. Beetup recycled lumber 4. Riskig kerosene lamp 5. Stupor hand blown by Nils 6. Smokum found on beach in Mendocino 7. Woblig 100% driftwood"

'We just invented cooking yesterday, and already she's serving leftovers!'

'Honey, I'm home - for good.'

'It's labour-saving because with this you'll be able to burn my meals much faster!'

But does he dust anything at our home? Noooo

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

Stone Age women were less happy than men at the arrival of the iron age: Look what I've invented just for you darling.