Domestic Disaster Connoisseur Pillows

'Darn! The wife is gonna kill me for not reading the label.'

College kid rakes up his clothes on the floor in messy dorm room

Girl who can't cook meets guys who can't fix stuff.

Mulching Vacuum Cleaner

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

"You overwatered the plant, again."

"Hang on, I know I came into the kitchen for something..."

'Put your tools away. We can't afford to pay any more tradesmen to fix another of your botched DIY projects.'

'I knew there was part of the pattern missing!'

"Hello?"

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

Volcanic ash...

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

'Barry, I think I know where you left the champagne bottle.'

Spiro & Pusho painting a room.

"Uh-oh...I fear this means trouble at the stock exchange!"

"...Oh no, not you. You couldn't be satisfied with one saucepan..."

'You called a plumber!'

'The gods are angry with the airlines.'

Continental Drift will end in disaster when the Arctic collides with the Antarctic and matter collides with anti-matter and explodes.

"There's something wrong with your dinner."

"Do I have a personal preparedness plan in case of a national emergency? Well, if screaming while running amok is a plan, then yes, I have a plan."

Bad Hobby Combination: The DIY Beehive/Mailbox

Leaking washing machine.

Father-in-law - Break glass in case of emergency

Setting fire to the Christmas Pud.

'-I told you you made that cat flap too small!'

Typical Taurus.

'Trouble is he doesn't know the difference between lube and putty. . . Our windows fell out!'

'It finally happened. We have so many dishes in the sink with unidentifiable crud stuck to them that they spontaneously combusted.'

"911? My husband is complaining of chest pains!"

"I promised I'd come back for you Gladys, come hell or high water."

"I left the toilet seat up once too often."

All sizzle and no roast

Remember Rudy Park, my college roommate? He just tipped me off to breaking news. Some geological disaster across the bridge. Wow. You should totally go cover that. I'm glad you think so, 'cause it wouldn't really be responsible to take a 2-year-old to a geological disaster. Could you watch my boy for a few days? On second thought, that's a boring story. Nobody wants to hear about that. He's almost potty trained. Sorry, I have a ... work ... ish thing.