Dog Lover With Humor Pillows

'I'll donate them to ANYONE but a DOG.'

"Do we have an exit strategy?"

"I'm working from home today."

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

Dog in love

"Wow, what a DILF."

Dog on a Shelf.

'In the alternate universe I've come up with, everything would be exactly the same except cats would bark.'

"If man is my best friend, why is he giving me this crap to eat?"

'Everybody from Liverpool's a comedian.'

"Oo, I get to write a memo! I'm excited! I'm excited!"

"He ran out of pee."

"You say you're flossing, but I'm scraping off a lot of tennis ball fuzz."

'I want you to 'take him for a walk.''

'This won't take long, nurse. This is the dog that got my best friend last summer.'

A skinny dog with clown make up

"Bad dog!"

"Don't put your money into stocks. Bury it!"

'Okay...now watch what happens when I extend my claws.'

'The pats on the head are nice, but I need more compensation...'

"I'm getting a little itchy to redo the bedroom!"

Woman Walking a Trojan Horse

The firehouse has a cat instead of a dalmation.

Prodigy - Woofgang Amadeus Mozart.

-'Do you have a last wish senor?' -'Yeah, I'd like to pee on your leg.'

'I was not expecting this, were you?'

"I have to tell you you were not my first choice for this job."

'I know how you feel.'

'It's all right. You're allowed to get up on this couch.'

Making an Audio Book: Quiet Please No Barking!!!

'Oh goody, chunky soup!'

The Haunted Dog House

A hunter has a dream that his dog has brought a game warden to punish him.

'Just what I wanted. Not!'

'You sound like a bunch of cats! The growl has to be deeper and the barks crisper. Okay, let's take it again from the first howl.'