Doctor's Little Helper Pillows

"Well, you can tell that David Silva that I said you definitely don't have cooties, Carolyn."

Man is stopped from entering doctor's surgery by a receptionist dressed as a bouncer.

"We're playing doctor. Do you have any old magazines for our waiting room?"

"I will give you the specimen some other time!"

"You need to take this thingamajig...and attach it to the whatchamacallit using a turny thing."

"Let's play make-believe. I'll diagnose you with a life-threatening illness, then cure you with a wonder-drug that turns out to be a placebo."

"Bad news, Dad—you're brain-dead!"

Social Worker

Junior Doctor.

'Let's play doctor - you be the patient, you be the surgeon, and I'll be the malpractice-attorney.'

'We're playing Doctor - he's the caddy.'

'How are you doing on your side?'

'I usually don't make house calls but I'm glad to make an exception in your case, Gran'ma.'

"According to the instructions, if the product is found to be faulty, dispose of it responsibly and purchase another."

"I have 15,000 patients...so my fantasy football team stinks."

"Well, there's nothing wrong with his lungs anyway."

"Will he be okay?"

'I insist on a nurse being present.'

The journey of life

"It's cooties."

"Oh, hello darling..."

Tipp-kick for brain surgeons.

'I am never going to fill out a prom dress.'

Dr Dinaram Cardiology: Hurt Feelings and Broken Hearts

'I could kiss it and make it better, but it's not covered by your insurance.'

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

"Yes, hello. I'm hoping you've found a cure for my hiccups...but I'm not holding my breath!"

'I'll level with you...You're sick as a dog.'

'I purchased this for my daughter. After reading about the effect of the healthcare law on the practice of medicine, I want to return it.'

'Brain surgery app.'

'I know! I know! But if I can beat chocolate, you can beat heroin!'

"You DO have health insurance, I assume!"

'Why yes, I do remember little Timmy.'

'How sweet, they're playing 'Doctors and Nurses.''

'It's a nasty little rash, nothing to worry about!'