Doctor Advice Interpreter Pillows

'My doctor told me avoid any unnecessary stress, so I didn't visit him today.'

"Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Good cholesterol, bad cholesterol. Finally, I cracked."

Dialogue

She - Interpreter - He.

'It's the essence of springtime. You're really enjoying it.'

"My nephew Jack here can say ‘I’m unemployed’ in seven languages."

"This is for the pain and these are for the side effects."

'Boss, it seems like a friendly text, but you've got to learn to read between the emoticons.'

"Mom said eat everything in moderation, so I renamed the cookie jar 'Moderation.'"

'I need a text-mail interpreter.'

"It said on the packet the pasta should act as a vehicle for the sauce."

'It says here you can talk trash in five languages.'

'I'm prescribing a laxative pill and a sleeping pill. Never, never take them together.'

Orator translates in many languages.

"Send for a Prftgxrgplwtkn interpreter - case adjourned for a thousand light years."

"I think our daughter should change her major. She can now ask for money in 3 different languages!"

"I'm a doctor - I'm SUPPOSED to be a health nut!"

"The diagnostic computer think I should defrag your hard drive."

'To be honest, I have my doubts about these modern dress versions.'

'Learn to relax and don't bottle yourself up.'

"You need to stop eating that sh*t."

'Yes, yes, yes, now seriously, what can we do to improve our health?'

Interpreter for the hard-to-believe-what-they're-hearing.

Company spokespersons statement being interpreted into plane English by a second spokesman.

'You have to give up this devil-may-care fattitude.'

Second Opinion

'The best thing for you, is to give up booze and smoking.'

'Well, if you don't smoke or drink, stop chewing gum!'

"You'll have to phrase it another way. They have no word for 'fetch.' "

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."