Dmv Employee Gifts

'Oh...Mostly because we can. Now do you want to get your car registered or not?'

"If there's anything else we can do to help make this a more frustrating experience, please let us know."

'For an additional fee I can touch up your DMV picture using digital photo editing software.'

'I'm leery of these govenment drones."

Company Parties at the DMV

'Squint your eyes and grit your teeth so I can make sure it's you.'

"I don't stand a chance."

"This is my lawyer—he's going to handle the fine print."

DMV. Drivers License Photos. Okay, now smile and say "What seems to be the problem, officer?"

"And check this box if you want to donate your body to 7th grade science."

"Remember, the customer is always right!"

'You're telling a king to use a number two pencil?'

To liven up her day, DMV employee Shirley Varb liked to shoot spitballs at people as they had their drivers' photos taken.

"Mr. Hodson definitely does not want to be disturbed right now."

"You may ask your questions only when I call your name. Don't waste my time with chit-chat. I don't have all day. Got that?"

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"You've got to fill in these forms to join the 'How to reduce bureaucracy' seminar."

"So we are agreed then, most of the targets we've set staff are completely unreasonable and we should just scrap them."

Storm in the out tray

Quality Control

How a Bill Becomes a Law, 2023

'So Kyle - have you considered the challenges of van driving?'

"We live in the golden age of fake news, alternative facts and spin control. Your resume is too truthful."

'According to the budget, we'll have to count on body heat to keep the offices warm.'

'Hi. Due to the regulation fervor, I'm one of the clowns from Washington here to tell you how to run your business.'

The government is lying to us about life on the moon phobia.

Pile of top secret files on a train. Man saying 'Is that seat free'

Backtrack! A game of Political Undoing

"We may have to rob from the rich AND the poor."

The lion statues in front of New York City Library are replaced with spies.

Bureau to cut back on bureaucratic paperwork...

'It's a new rule, sir - There's a seven-day waiting period for stamps now.'

Bureaucrats held up by the workers.

Best System in the World

Bureau of Disappearing Civil Liberties.