Dishwashing Warrior Gifts

"It's only fair to warn you, I've joined the Union Of Dishwashers."

Kitchen Tetris

"Garbage in, garbage out!"

'I don't understand: I lick the plates clean, but Mistress still puts them in the dishwasher afterwards...'

The household cavalry

Odysseus returns to the Laundromat

Those missing socks...where do they go?

"Not cool washing sheep in the dishwasher people!"

'We've finished the dishes, Miss. Jenny washes, I wiped, and Susan picked up all the pieces.'

'It doesn't look good, sir - the enemy is amassing vacuum cleaners along our southern border.'

"Laundry or composting?"

"Here comes someone now. If we're lucky they haven't had their fly shot, or won't wash their hands!"

Female sock walks away from male sock, saying: 'Look, it's just a trial separation, OK?'

Human Dust Buster

4 Great Life Hacks for the Holidays!

'Why is it I can see what needs doing around here and you can't? . . . I know what cures that. . . 'Chores-ercise'.'

Our house is a mess! Life's messy, I need to simplify. You don't have the nerve to do what needs to be done. We left our laundry on the sofa for you, mom! You're so wrong. I can too get rid of my kids. You'll save tons on cleaning supplies alone!

'Bob, you're suffering from embarrassing static cling.'

"You used the right amount of detergent and fabric softener. The problem is this washing machine isn't for dishes."

'Don't blame me, I told you to pick your feet up.'

"Remember when all this was free?"

'We already have a helper monkey for that.'

Hey! I just vacuumed there!! Sisyphus at home.

'I don't know how I got rid of mildew before Henry got me the flamethrower.'

"For the last time-empty your pockets before you put your robe in the wash."

"Some of your lost socks were clogging up the motor."

'There was a what in your soup?'

"I did take off my muddy shoes, mom...these are my socks!"

"The boss started me on the bottom. Not in the mail room, but in the office cafeteria washing dishes."

"Dropping a spoon means a beautiful woman will visit soon."

"My kitchen is a magical place. People suddenly appear at mealtime and disappear when it's time to clean."

Cleaning woman enter's doctor's office with huge medical supplies to use to clean office.

"I said, I think it's time we changed the cat's litter box!"

"First."

"I'll need a sticker per sock."