Disaster Preparedness Lover Gifts

Nuclear energy

Department of No One Could Have Anticipated.

Natural Disasters

IRMA Hurricane Recovery in Cuba

'You'll find there's no middle ground with Kirk Knoland.'

"We're going to have a post-flood economy to deal with."

'Relax. This is only a test.'

Emergency Underpants

"Did we just paint the house or did it just paint us?!"

Disasters

Hurricane damage to trees

We can't call an ambulance. He doesn't allow personal calls on company time.

'The tropical tax haven where he offshored his business was just hit by a tsunami.'

'Of course the scientists have got this all wrong about climate change.'

'Start spreading the news, I'm leaving today!'

Tornado Season in America.

'I hear Oog gave up inventing.'

Eric Cantor, Republican, Fiscal Conservative, Sociopath

"Do I have a personal preparedness plan in case of a national emergency? Well, if screaming while running amok is a plan, then yes, I have a plan."

Flood Rescues

Alberta on fire

Where's the leak then?

You Can't Escape Zombies in a Canoe

"Then we're all agreed. We'll repair the earthquake damage to every structure in town except for this one, which we'll leave as a reminder of the dangers of shoddy construction."

How To Deal With The Upcoming Recession, Inflation, Depression, Ice Age, Greenhouse Effect, Energy Crunch, Population Explosion, and Complete End of the World in the Year 2000.

'If you remember, the last thing I said before the ship went down was, 'don't forget to bring the ball'.'

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

Break Glass and Pull in the Event of Flaccid Pecs

"No doubt you're asking yourself, what are hatches? And how the heck does one go about battening them down?"

'Quiet! I want to hear the weather report!'

"I learned my lesson after Katrina and the BP oil spill. Basically, it's be ready for just about anything."

Help on the Way

'Later that day Sally was told that the earthquake measured 6.8 on the Richter scale.'

Man on a sinking ship blowing up an inflatable desert island.

Retirement Planning. Forget a 401K plan. What your account needs is a 911 plan.