Dining Mishap Fan Gifts

'I told you not to order the stake.'

"Charles didn't like tofu."

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

"I never understand what you're trying to say."

'I'm sorry we put bearnaise sauce on your fillet by mistake. Randy will have it off there in a jiffy.'

'No, no... I ordered a tart, not a tort!'

'Let me start off by saying this: I called you in here by mistake, and now I want you to leave.'

"Just keep your eyes closed - it'll only upset you."

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

"Waiter - there's no fly in my soup!"

"Of course it tastes like chicken. That's why it's called the 'tuna surprise'."

"No, no, no, my wife said she'll have a quiche!"

'You ate the styrofoam, and left the meringue.'

'Are you sure you are not allergic to seafood.'

"Say when!"

'Well, lucky you! The chef informs me that his breakfast special today is blackened scrambled eggs!'

'Last month's meeting ended on a high note. Primarily because a disgruntled investor kicked our CEO in the groin.'

Chinese restaurant: In case of emergency break glass (Knife and fork).

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

"No, he isn't choking. He coughed."

"Captain, this Brie is totally out of control!"

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

'How was the snapper, sir?'

'Here we put the emphasis exclusively on the food!'

''Honey!...Have you seen the brussel sprout casserole I made for dinner tonight?'

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."

"A glitch in production - everyone gets a prune omelette with sardines."

Clancy Strip:Bad Service at the Diner

Murphy's Slaw.

"How is everything?"

'Oh, sorry...so you ordered a steak sandwich?'

"Gesundheit!"